February 3, 2012

Crash Course (or Should I Say Post?) in the Art of Chivalry and Wooing

If you're prone to thinking chivalry is archaic, allow me to enlighten you: It's not. So in the spirit of Valentine's Day coming up, gentlemen, I'm imparting wisdom to you all. Take Note!

Acts of Wooing & Chivalry That Are Sure to Win You Brownie Points...

Offer a Helping Hand & Serve Her. Open that door! Help her carry those heavy things! Offer her that seat! It's cold out? Give her that coat! Flex those arm muscles! Show us your strength. Chivalry is all about acts of service.

Have Good Manners. Just take it from Frank, he knows best...
I may sound old-fashioned, but I want to think all women should be treated like I want my wife, daughters, and granddaughters to be treated. I notice today that good manners—like standing up when a woman enters the room, helping a woman with her coat, letting her enter an elevator first, taking her arm to cross the street—are sometimes considered unnecessary or a throwback. These are habits I could never break, nor would I want to. I realize today a lot more women are taking care of themselves than in the past, but no woman is offended by politeness. -Frank Sinatra
Send Her Flowers. I've yet to meet a woman who didn't like receiving a bouquet of fresh, beautiful flowers. To those who would argue otherwise... I'm pretty sure they're lying. And did you know that all flowers have a specific meaning attached to them? No? Well they do. Apparently people used to know that kind of thing in the Victorian era because they published whole books on it. (Just an idea if you want to impress her.) Double brownie points to you if you figure out her favorite flowers and send them to her! (It'll prove you paid attention!)

No going dutch! Oh. My. Gosh. Seriously, if you go to the trouble to ask her out on a date date (not the proverbial Christian coffee date), you better be paying! Because if I were the girl you were asking out, and you pulled that... let's just say there probably wouldn't be a second date. By paying for the meal you're telling her that you genuinely value getting to spend this time with her. Remember, we're talking about wooing here. Wooing implies you're trying to win her affections, which will cost you a couple of dinners at Olive Garden (or wherever else you take her).

Small Tokens and Gifts. In order to be successful with these, you need to study her. What sort of things would she like? Fit the gift to the girl's personality. For instance, I really like handmade things, letters, cards, coffee, books, special outings, but other girls like stuffed bears and jewelry and... other stuff... I'm sure there's lots more...

Develop a Taste for Austen. You can score serious points with ladies if you're into Austen. Pride and Predjudice, Emma, Sense and Sensibility, Persuasion, Mansfield Park, and Northanger Abbey. Figure out her favorite. Watch those movies with her. She'll love you for it.

Serenading. Please don't do this unless you can actually sing on tune. Or if she'd get a good laugh out of it.
Finally, do yourself a favor and read Brett Harris's Series When Lancelot Comes Riding. And girls, if I left out any acts of wooing, you can share them in the comments.


  1. Listening. Like really, listening.
    You don't have to understand her, but make sure you listen intently and with your whole attention.

  2. YES! I can't believe I forgot that all important one!

  3. I love these! hehe. Especially the taste for Austen. My hubby has yet to do that, but he's romantic enough! :) I would add respect. I guy needs to show that he respects and values you as a treasure. It shows you what it will be like in the long run.

  4. sweet post :) :)
    i had forgotten about The Importance of Being earnest! omg!! hilarious!

  5. Amen! More men should take your advice :)

  6. Amen! More men should take your advice :)


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