January 13, 2012

Let Your Love Be Genuine

Let love be genuine... -Romans 12:9
Romans 12:9-21 is what most Bibles have labeled as the Marks of True Christians. If that's true, then they should also pour over into how we do relationships with the opposite sex as well.

Staying true to his teaching style, Paul starts off with love. Let love be genuine, or as other translations read Let love be sincere. The words genuine and sincere mean without hypocrisy or the person, thing, emotion, or action is authentic. Synonyms of the two include heartfelt, real, profound, deep, honest, truthful, straightforward, and direct.

Our relationships should reflect these attributes. They should be honest, truthful, and real. We shouldn't be putting on masks and preforming for one another. I know it sounds cliche and it's overused, but you should be able to be yourself with the guy or girl. Let's be honest here, nobody wants to be with someone who doesn't like them for who they are. And constantly having to hide and act a certain way gets exhausting pretty quickly. We should be with the guy (or girl) who shares some of our same interests, likes, dislikes (it doesn't have to be all of them), appreciates our quirks (because there are plenty of them), holds to the same ideals and beliefs, etc. Contrary to popular belief that opposites attract, several studies have shown, that couples who are mostly opposites are in the minority. For the most part, similarities attract.

Our relationships should be heartfelt, profound, and deep. Relationships that are built only on surface level things cannot weather the storms of life and don't last that long. Meaningful relationships have depth to them, which is something that takes time to build and invest in.

Our relationships should be straightforward, direct, and have intention. You can call me old fashion if you want, but when I enter into a relationship I take it pretty seriously. I had one brief relationship with a guy where there was absolutely no direction at all in the relationship... and it drove me crazy. It was like we were in limbo land... until the girl he really wanted to be with became available, but that's a different story (and lesson learned) to be shared a different day. Girls, you shouldn't have a long list of boyfriends because you feel unlovable and invaluable when you don't have one. Those are lies, and as God's dearly loved daughters you deserve better than that. Wait for the guy who sees pursuing and getting to know you as a valuable use of his time and worth every effort and inconvenience. Now, that doesn't mean that our relationships have to start off on an serious or extreme note, but there needs to be some sort of purpose to the two of you being together, and personally I think that should be to get to know one another and then see if there's a possibility of marriage with that person. (Which also means I tend to be a more particular in who I date.) Romantic relationship that are vague don't personify genuine love, but rather are ones built on selfishness. We really have no right asking for someones affections if we aren't willing to act purposefully and to honor and value those affections. In order for our relationships with one another to glorify God, they need to be marked with genuine, sincere love. When this is the heartbeat and central point to our relationships everything else falls into its proper place.

Now, having said all that, there are no formulas when it comes to how our relationships play out. For each couple has unique qualities, characteristics, backgrounds, tastes, passions, goals, etc. Therefore, each relationship unfolds in a different way.


  1. Its always sad when I hear girls pretending to be who they THINK the guy wants just to keep the guy. And then as soon as they snag him, revert to their original self, leaving the guy stunned and annoyed!

    From the start, I was completely 100% myself with G-man and for me, its easy to do things for him and his guy friends would always say, 'just wait man, it'll change...she won't keep doing things for you or be this nice to you... just wait.'

    Thankfully G saw I was genuine and not putting up a front, but its sad guys think that because so many girls have led them to believe it.

    Emily at Amazing Grapes

  2. This is something I needed to hear badly. Thank you!

  3. oh hon you might be so stressed about "life" but let me tell you something. you have something so much more valuable here, A HEART FOR GOD, godly wisdom that can't come CLOSE to compare to earthly troubles. Don't forget that.

    Wow, you are how old?!


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